No. You don't get it.
Listen to the chorus of guys. Guys are oblivious. Really.
Oh, guys notice. We tend to be very visual. But we don't notice what women think we notice.
Experiment for you. Remember the last time that you got a hair cut. Remember who made unsolicited comments on it. Did the list include any guys? Likely not, and if there was one then he was probably in a relationship with you and considers it his job to notice and respond appropriately. Did the list include any gals? I'll bet it did!
Repeat said thought experiment with a nice piece of clothing. Most guys can't even tell you what the woman sitting next to them is wearing without turning and looking. Most women remember people by what they are wearing. Yet women expect men to react to what they effectively don't even see.
Guys are oblivious to what women do to enhance their appearances. Seriously oblivious.
In fact we often respond negatively to things that women are unaware of. Take perfume, for instance. I'm still looking for a polite way to say, "Your perfume makes me sick." Every so often I really want to say it to strangers in elevators, because it really is true. I know that they believe that it makes them more attractive. They're dead wrong.
Another example is lipstick. Some men react positively to it, others do not. I do not for the simple reason that it isn't fun to kiss lips with lipstick, chapstick, etc on them. I'm far from alone.
OTOH guys are very visual. If you want to know what the average guy notices, look at ads aimed at men. (Madison Avenue studies this kind of thing very seriously.) Beer ads are a good example. The faces don't have masses of make-up, secondary sexual attributes (primarily t&a) are played to the hilt.
Blunt, but effective.
So the point is quite straightforward. Women spend an hour a day in the bathroom and the net effect is that they impress (or not) other women, and most of the effort is wasted if they're really trying to get men to notice anything. Whatever women may think they are doing, what they are succeeding in doing is impressing other women, not attracting men.
Cheers,
Ben
I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)
Edited by
ben_tilly
Feb. 11, 2005, 03:24:30 PM EST
No. You don't get it.
Listen to the chorus of guys. Guys are oblivious. Really.
Oh, guys notice. We tend to be very visual. But we don't notice what women think we notice.
Experiment for you. Remember the last time that you got a hair cut. Remember who made unsolicited comments on it. Did the list include any guys? Likely not, and if there was one then he was probably in a relationship with you and considers it his job to notice and respond appropriately. Did the list include any gals? I'll bet it did!
Repeat said thought experiment with a nice piece of clothing. Most guys can't even tell you what the woman sitting next to them is wearing without turning and looking. Most women remember people by what they are wearing. Yet women expect men to react to what they effectively don't even see.
Guys are oblivious to what women do to enhance their appearances. Seriously oblivious.
In fact we often respond negatively to things that women are unaware of. Take perfume, for instance. I'm still looking for a polite way to say, "Your perfume makes me sick." Every so often I really want to say it to strangers in elevators, because it really is true. I know that they believe that it makes them more attractive. They're dead wrong.
Another example is lipstick. Some men react positively to it, others do not. I do not for the simple reason that it isn't fun to kiss lips with lipstick, chapstick, etc on them. I'm far from alone.
OTOH guys are very visual. If you want to know what the average guy notices, look at ads aimed at men. (Madison Avenue studies this kind of thing very seriously.) Beer ads are a good example. The faces don't have masses of make-up, secondary sexual attributes (primarily t&a) are played to the hilt.
Blunt, but effective.
So the point is quite straightforward. Women spend an hour a day in the bathroom and the net effect is that they impress (or not) other women, and most of the effort is wasted if they're really trying to get men to notice anything. Whatever women may think they are doing, what they are succeeding in doing is impress other women, not attract men.
Cheers,
Ben
I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)
