Son who seems to be smarter than me. With my ego, that almost hurts to say. Then again, my genes, so it's OK.

Not as bright as Scott's son, but then again, who the hell is?

Reasonably intelligent daughter. Not saying she's stupid, but she has her moments.

She PLAYS really stupid though, in order to get other people to do her homework. She knows she's not as smart as Ben, and uses it to her advantage.

What she lacks in straight intelligence she make up for in amoral animal cunning.