True, true

Post #196,499 by ben_tilly 2/27/05 5:41:11 AM Reply	True, true The party is less important to me than my son's care. Cheers, Ben I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)
Post #196,508 by drewk 2/27/05 8:55:10 AM Reply	Hate to say 'I told you so', but ... No wait, I love to say it! When Peter and I said that, due to family considerations, there were certin options that simply weren't possible choices, you were pretty insistent that there was always a choice. IIRC Peter said to see how you feel about it when you have kids of your own. Doesn't seem to have taken long before you're saying that your actions are "Certainly not by choice!" I'll give you a few years to come to terms with the fact that you'll start saying things to your child you swore you never would. Welcome to the club! :-) === Purveyor of Doc Hope's [link\|http://DocHope.com\|fresh-baked dog biscuits and pet treats]. [link\|http://DocHope.com\|http://DocHope.com]
Post #196,533 by ben_tilly 2/27/05 12:44:46 PM Reply	I'm still insistent that there is a choice I'm also clear on what my priorities are. Cheers, Ben I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)
Post #196,511 by broomberg 2/27/05 9:28:24 AM Reply	Perfectly good choice If the party affects your son's care in a detrimental way, of course you would choose your son over the party. But now I'm trying to understand how this affect would happen. Hmm. Loss of father over a 2 day period. Something tells me it won't hurt him emotionally or physically, but for all I know you've been the primary care giver, have taken him with you to work every day, and he is so superadvanced (he is YOUR son, ya know) that he's reached the development stage where separation anxiety is an issue. Party in early July, SETI born in late November, SETI will be about 6.5 months old. Since self-awareness usually kicks in between 8-11 months, I guess it is possible. What else? Lack of trust of non-parent caregivers? After all, your wife is a very busy person, which means you guy juggle the care time. If you have no fall-back for someone else doing it, could be an issue. I know I trusted NO ONE with my kids other than Barb and myself for the longest time. Cost - you make so little that the cost of the trip will cause a balancing act to fail, robbing your child of his food, shelter, and finally his college fund. Hey, if that's the case, I'm sure we could kick in for airfare. ;-} Lack of stability of spousal unit. Since you never said a bad word about a crazy wife, I doubt that is it. OK, I don't see it. Maybe there is some indirect aspect of SETI's care that the party will affect.
Post #196,535 by ben_tilly 2/27/05 12:49:27 PM Reply	Some points that you're missing That's the first week that my wife goes back to work. She may well need a break. That is likely to directly follow a move to a different city, probably across the country. In which case we'll still be in boxes and won't have local friends. We'll likely still be figuring out child care. If Sam wasn't part of the picture, I'd have no problem with going anyways. But enough other factors are present that I may indeed be needed to take care of him. Cheers, Ben I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)
Post #196,544 by broomberg 2/27/05 2:18:44 PM Reply	Cross country? But not sure yet? Tough time, obviously can't make any real plans since so much is open.
Post #196,576 by ben_tilly 2/27/05 10:10:27 PM Reply	Depends on where my wife gets a residency And yes, it does make it hard to plan. Cheers, Ben I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)

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