Such hydrocoptic virtuosity wasted on a mere bagatelle..!

Now let's get down to animal husbandry and survival of the species:

First - ya need to fabricate some 'Press' credentials.
Then - the zIWE Irregulars pass-hat for steerage passage + pretzels.
Last - somehow we gets ya into the White House as furrin Press
THEN.. You Ask Ari a Question. With er 'follow-up'.

Got it?