Post #263,747
8/4/06 10:23:41 AM
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My Mom is dying.
She is in the hospital- emphysema. The hot weather did her in. Doc just called, told me to round up the family and come to the hospital. Said it is very very bad. She is DNR. They will do what they can to make her comfortable. She is suffocating in her own body.
We dont have much family. Just my 3 sisters and the 5 kids between us. I called my sisters. All are hysterical. I calmed them down, told them "I'll be your mom from now on". We are all heading to the hospital to say goodbye.
My mom is scared. I talked to her yesterday about dying. Eyes wide with fear.
My 7 yo daughter told my Mom that it is okay when she dies because she will get to see Elvis in Heaven. I think we all need to look at this through the eyes of a 7 year old child.
Gonna be a long day.
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Post #263,748
8/4/06 10:29:21 AM
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Condolences
-YendorMike
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
- Benjamin Franklin, 1759 Historical Review of Pennsylvania
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Post #263,752
8/4/06 10:35:55 AM
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Sorry to hear it, Laura. :(
I'll keep you in my thoughts.
Alex
When fascism comes to America, it'll be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross. -- Sinclair Lewis
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Post #263,757
8/4/06 10:39:52 AM
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:-(
my thoughts are with you
Darrell Spice, Jr. Trendy yet complex\nPeople seek me out - though they're not sure why\n[link|http://spiceware.org/gallery/ArtisticOverpass|Artistic Overpass] [link|http://www.spiceware.org/|SpiceWare]
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Post #263,760
8/4/06 10:47:20 AM
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oh man... condolences
Any opinions expressed by me are mine alone, posted from my home computer, on my own time as a free american and do not reflect the opinions of any person or company that I have had professional relations with in the past 50 years. meep
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Post #263,764
8/4/06 11:03:49 AM
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I'm very sorry to hear that.
--\n-------------------------------------------------------------------\n* Jack Troughton jake at consultron.ca *\n* [link|http://consultron.ca|http://consultron.ca] [link|irc://irc.ecomstation.ca|irc://irc.ecomstation.ca] *\n* Kingston Ontario Canada [link|news://news.consultron.ca|news://news.consultron.ca] *\n-------------------------------------------------------------------
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Post #263,765
8/4/06 11:39:22 AM
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I'm sorry to hear it
"Pictures are better then words because some words are big and hard to understand"
Peter Griffin (Family Guy)
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Post #263,766
8/4/06 11:43:06 AM
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I'm so sorry...
That sucks.
My prayers are with you and your family.
Imric's Tips for Living
- Paranoia Is a Survival Trait
- Pessimists are never disappointed - but sometimes, if they are very lucky, they can be pleasantly surprised...
- Even though everyone is out to get you, it doesn't matter unless you let them win.
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Nothing is as simple as it seems in the beginning,
As hopeless as it seems in the middle,
Or as finished as it seems in the end.
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Post #263,767
8/4/06 11:49:17 AM
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I'm so sorry to hear.
Best wishes, thoughts and prayers for your family.
--
Steve
[link|http://www.ubuntulinux.org|Ubuntu]
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Post #263,768
8/4/06 11:49:20 AM
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Words aren't enough ;_-(
Condolences to the family. Hope everyone stays together through this. I watched the effect this had on my father, who was the "be strong" one for his family. I already had great love and respect...but somehow this crisis for him made it those things even greater and deeper.
Hope this unfortunate event has similar benefits for you...bringing your family closer.
And I agree, the eyes of a child are a wondrous thing.
Prayers with you.
Too much of today's music is fashionable crap dressed as artistry.Adrian Belew
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Post #263,770
8/4/06 11:50:45 AM
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So sorry, Laura. Condolences.
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Post #263,772
8/4/06 11:52:39 AM
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I'm sorry for you Laura. Hang in there.
-----------------------------------------
Impeach Bush. Impeach Cheney. Do it now.
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Post #263,773
8/4/06 12:18:54 PM
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Say what you need to say.
This is the last chance you have to talk to your mom; if there is anything you would regret not saying, now is the time to do it.
Take care of yourself.
Hurt me if you must, but let the duckie go!
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Post #263,775
8/4/06 12:28:54 PM
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I agree with Thane
Say whatever you need to say now, and encourage your sisters to do the same.
My condolences are with you and my prayers for all of you to handle this situation. How is your son handling it?
Ironic, because I was thinking this morning that today is John's stepdad's funeral, and wondering how his mom was coping so I said a prayer... then I find someone else who needs that same type of support on here.
We're here for you Laura.
Brenda
"When you take charge of your life, there is no longer need to ask permission of other people or society at large. When you ask permission, you give someone veto power over your life." -- By Geoffrey F. Abert
****************************
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind, don't matter - and those who matter, don't mind." -- By Dr. Seuss
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"Sometimes it takes a whole lot more strength to walk away than to stand there and fight." -- By the character of John Abbott: said on Young & Restless on 5/19/06
*********************************
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Post #263,777
8/4/06 12:41:57 PM
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I'm very sorry. :-( Condolences to you and yours.
The doctor should be able to make her comfortable if there's nothing that can be done.
Make sure you're able to show some weakness too. Make sure you allow time for yourself for grief and remebrance.
Hang in there.
:-(
Cheers,
Scott.
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Post #263,778
8/4/06 12:47:05 PM
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I add my regrets
It sounds a hard way to go. There have been human cultures more, ah, grounded than the one in which we find ourselves that provide structures—ceremonies, traditions—to make sense of the transition for the dying and for the soon-to-be bereaved. Our dessicated consumer society leaves us largely to improvise these things when the crises come. Best wishes to all as you thread the needle.
cordially,
Die Welt ist alles, was der Fall ist.
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Post #263,779
8/4/06 1:37:49 PM
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Wow, what a bummer!
The heat is really a dangerous thing.
You have my thoughts, that aren't devoted to fixing myself.
-- [link|mailto:greg@gregfolkert.net|greg], [link|http://www.iwethey.org/ed_curry|REMEMBER ED CURRY!] @ iwetheyFreedom is not FREE. Yeah, but 10s of Trillions of US Dollars? SELECT * FROM scog WHERE ethics > 0;
0 rows returned.
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Post #263,780
8/4/06 1:46:12 PM
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AND.
you have mine, too
Friend.
Too much of today's music is fashionable crap dressed as artistry.Adrian Belew
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Post #263,781
8/4/06 1:50:45 PM
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((((((Laura)))))))
I'm so sorry.
Carry us in your heart, because we will be carrying you.
love,
Amy
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Post #263,785
8/4/06 2:07:36 PM
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Your 7yo has wisdom beyond her years.
And you beyond yours for knowing to look at this through her eyes....
jb4
"So don't pay attention to the approval ratings that say 68% of Americans disapprove of the job this man is doing. I ask you this, does that not also logically mean that 68% approve of the job he's not doing? Think about it. I haven't."
— Stephen Colbert, at the White House Correspondent's Dinner 29Apr06
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Post #263,797
8/4/06 2:57:52 PM
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She will be in good hands
when you arrive. Your experience and good sense is clearly working, despite the shock - all you need to remember is.. nothing. We always have to wing it with good-byes, but you'll see that the words that come out will possibly even surprise yourself. You don't need any advice.
Candle lighted - never can hurt. Buck up.
(Elvis is fine.. long as she's an Elvis fan. Me.. wanna hear Amelita Galli-Curci sing, then BS a bit with H. L. Mencken. See? there are no Rules for this stuff..)
moi
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Post #263,819
8/4/06 6:42:48 PM
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Must be that kind of day.
Co-worker's father died this morning.
Hang in there.
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Post #263,861
8/5/06 7:29:18 AM
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My manager's mother died last week
It's always hard when you lose a parent. We are all here for you. Many ears to listen and shoulders for crying.
My deepest condolences
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. (Herm Albright)
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Post #263,821
8/4/06 8:24:30 PM
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You have my sympathies
in this time of your family needs.
"It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English -- up to fifty words used in correct context -- no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese."
Carl Sagan (1934 - 1996)
[link|http://district268.xormad.com|I am from District 268].
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Post #263,855
8/5/06 1:30:43 AM
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it's good that you can be with her
(sigh)
cherish the time she has,
cherish your memories.
(hug)
Have fun,
Carl Forde
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Post #263,859
8/5/06 2:00:15 AM
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Be strong.
Remember the good times.
Peter
[link|http://www.no2id.net/|Don't Let The Terrorists Win]
[link|http://www.kuro5hin.org|There is no K5 Cabal]
[link|http://guildenstern.dyndns.org|Home]
Use P2P for legitimate purposes!
[link|http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?pwhysall|A better terminal emulator]
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Post #263,862
8/5/06 8:50:29 AM
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Very sorry to hear it, Laura.
It's good that you can talk to her though.
Regards,
-scott anderson
"Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson..."
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Post #263,868
8/5/06 10:04:25 AM
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Fat Elvis or skinny Elvis?
Sorry.
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Post #263,918
8/6/06 8:54:46 AM
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What can I add...
... apart from another homily?
{{Bionerd}}
Wade.
"Insert crowbar. Apply force."
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Post #263,964
8/6/06 7:41:35 PM
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You've done well with the seven year old
===
Purveyor of Doc Hope's [link|http://DocHope.com|fresh-baked dog biscuits and pet treats].
[link|http://DocHope.com|http://DocHope.com]
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Post #263,978
8/6/06 9:41:27 PM
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:-( What they all said. And tell Elvis he's still famous.
Two out of three people wonder where the other one is.
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Post #264,036
8/7/06 10:33:26 AM
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That's because he is still alive living in Kalamazoo
My mother WILL NOT DIE!
Most of the time she looks like a living corpse. Every now and then she'll become lucid. Yesterday I fed her dinner and she enjoyed it and said it was good. The doctor said if she werent DNR she'd be on a vent now. She is in respiratory and cardiac failure. When she is awake she is confused. She said she saw her dead mother. I asked her if she saw Elvis (c'mon.. humor does a lot to get you through the rough spots) and she said no. I told her maybe tomorrow.
Family and friends have been filing in. We've all said our goodbyes. Please die, please die, please die. I've done everything I can to help her let go. As always, she is riding my last nerve to the bitter end. What is that last nerve going to do when she is gone?
I have to talk to the doctor today about what to do if she hangs in there. Hospice? Nursing home? Cant care for her at home like this.
I'm beginning to hate that hospital.
My son Mitch is taking this very hard. Lots of tears and sleep problems. Emma continues to bounce along, eager to know what Grandma will look like with wings. Friday night I was watching all the cousins while everyone else was at the hospital. I was exhausted. Falling asleep in my chair. The kids were in the yard. Emma yells in "Mumma, can we have a shovel?" Hmm? What? Okay.. "Mumma, can we use the hose?" Whhhaatt? Sure...
Then I woke up. That didnt sound good.
She and her cousins dug a moat around one side of the garage and filled it with water. They were swimming and covered in mud. Okay. At least they were leaving me alone. I hosed them off and made them stay outside till they dried. Dang kids.
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Post #264,038
8/7/06 10:36:40 AM
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Dang it!
Just get used to me being ShizzyMamma1.
Stupid Rita and her multiple users names.
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Post #264,040
8/7/06 10:39:24 AM
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Just remember
The more crap the kids pull now, the more fondly they'll remember this time when people reminisce about your mother. Just keep them out of the flowers.
===
Purveyor of Doc Hope's [link|http://DocHope.com|fresh-baked dog biscuits and pet treats].
[link|http://DocHope.com|http://DocHope.com]
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Post #264,042
8/7/06 10:41:15 AM
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Well, yeah.
Nobody messes with my flowers.
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