Yes, clearly the boob thing and Nelly's crotch-grabbing didn't fit in with the Super Bowl ads touting long-term erections or Budweiser's guy- friendly misogyny, bestiality and flatulent horses. Somebody has to stand up for standards.

Maybe Janet's now-famous right breast was the break-point for the morality police. After all, it had been a less than wholesome day. See, there's a difference between throwing a football through a tire to illustrate, one would assume, that taking a tiny pill not only gives you a monster erection but also a good passing arm -- and flat-out nudity. Because if you're a parent and your kid says, "Mom and Dad -- why is that man throwing a football through a tire?," you can just ignore it or pretend to be sleeping. But it's hard to dismiss a breast, plain as day. You've got to tell Little Jimmy that was a CGI breast, not a real one; and Little Emma that, no, she can't get a silver sun pierced through her nipple.

All you want is some good old, violent American football, but instead you've got the Spice Channel.

Understood. But going beyond this particular context, it's a breast. And, truth be told, a damn good one. Is that more damaging than, say, having the networks show some drug-addicted perp get shot through the eye at 9 p.m. pretty much every night? We might be getting our collective panties in a twist here over the wrong thing. Just thinking out loud.