I'm new to the area. I have no friends here. Let's face it, I very few friends anywhere. But none here.
M works in a nursing home. And gets invited to a house. The picture that accompanied the text was a table full of fireworks. A big table.
Turns out that there are people who live in this area who live in the unincorporated county area. They have no laws. If it's not a county law, it doesn't apply to them. And this county does not give a s*** about the fireworks. Go blow s*** up. Have fun!
These people have a long tradition of blowing s*** up. And they simply use sparklers.
Sparklers?
Yep, sparklers.
Take 100 sparklers and wrap them with tape. Have one of the sparklers extend a couple inches to be used as the fuse.
Take a discarded washing machine. Flipped upside down. Place sparkler/tape a bundle underneath it and light.
Run.
Ka-f****** boom. The first time the washer gets sent about 30 feet in the air. The second time there is nothing left of the washer. So they pull out the 55 gallon steel drum. And send that into the air.
The commercial fireworks were top of the line. I had s*** blowing up on top of me that I've never experienced before and I've been in the center of fireworks displays. These people put on a goddamn show in their backyard. That is better than anything I've ever experienced at a fair.
Beep bash this was not. To start off with I had to drive home which was all of a 20 minute drive. But it was still drive. So I only had three shots in 3 hours. Of course I showed up with about a quarter ounce of headband cannabis. Only smoked about half of that as I passed it around the crowd and then gave the homeowner the remaining weed on the way out. It was her favorite strain. Headband, I recommend it for you weed smokers. If you ever can find it, buy it.
When my choice for the music came I told them to put on the Dropkick Murphys, Kiss me. I'm s***-faced.
I butterfly the crowd. I dance between three or four people and spin stories. I know the look that someone has when the story gets boring. I dance and distract. I get the best phrase I ever hear: when's the book coming out? Never. I promised the kid I'd never write it down.
I dance with the old lady who owns the house I'm at. She is a tough/sweetheart. And tonight she dances. Her husband looks at me like I'm trying to steal his wife. I merely spin around and hand her back.
I'm wearing moccasin slippers. These are commented on loudly and I get to say how I don't give a s*** about what something looks like, I give a s*** about what it feels like. I am practically shaved bald. It's been growing in for a couple weeks. I'm a strange looking dude but I am very comfortable. I brought my own chair. A folding camping chair that has a foot rest. I set up court. This is not my house. These are not my people. But an hour later they are.
Dogs. There are multiple dogs but let me tell you about this special white giant. His name is Indy. He is a mix between a malamute and a timber wolf. He does not have the far away timber wolf look. This dog will engage you directly and be very happy when you pet it. This dog will shed enough to fill a blanket everyday.
So I have a lovely evening. My wife enjoys her coworkers/ friends and I get my social interaction for the year. Actually will invite a few of them over to our place in a bit. So it was a very nice evening and it laid the groundwork for a very nice future. I like living here.
M works in a nursing home. And gets invited to a house. The picture that accompanied the text was a table full of fireworks. A big table.
Turns out that there are people who live in this area who live in the unincorporated county area. They have no laws. If it's not a county law, it doesn't apply to them. And this county does not give a s*** about the fireworks. Go blow s*** up. Have fun!
These people have a long tradition of blowing s*** up. And they simply use sparklers.
Sparklers?
Yep, sparklers.
Take 100 sparklers and wrap them with tape. Have one of the sparklers extend a couple inches to be used as the fuse.
Take a discarded washing machine. Flipped upside down. Place sparkler/tape a bundle underneath it and light.
Run.
Ka-f****** boom. The first time the washer gets sent about 30 feet in the air. The second time there is nothing left of the washer. So they pull out the 55 gallon steel drum. And send that into the air.
The commercial fireworks were top of the line. I had s*** blowing up on top of me that I've never experienced before and I've been in the center of fireworks displays. These people put on a goddamn show in their backyard. That is better than anything I've ever experienced at a fair.
Beep bash this was not. To start off with I had to drive home which was all of a 20 minute drive. But it was still drive. So I only had three shots in 3 hours. Of course I showed up with about a quarter ounce of headband cannabis. Only smoked about half of that as I passed it around the crowd and then gave the homeowner the remaining weed on the way out. It was her favorite strain. Headband, I recommend it for you weed smokers. If you ever can find it, buy it.
When my choice for the music came I told them to put on the Dropkick Murphys, Kiss me. I'm s***-faced.
I butterfly the crowd. I dance between three or four people and spin stories. I know the look that someone has when the story gets boring. I dance and distract. I get the best phrase I ever hear: when's the book coming out? Never. I promised the kid I'd never write it down.
I dance with the old lady who owns the house I'm at. She is a tough/sweetheart. And tonight she dances. Her husband looks at me like I'm trying to steal his wife. I merely spin around and hand her back.
I'm wearing moccasin slippers. These are commented on loudly and I get to say how I don't give a s*** about what something looks like, I give a s*** about what it feels like. I am practically shaved bald. It's been growing in for a couple weeks. I'm a strange looking dude but I am very comfortable. I brought my own chair. A folding camping chair that has a foot rest. I set up court. This is not my house. These are not my people. But an hour later they are.
Dogs. There are multiple dogs but let me tell you about this special white giant. His name is Indy. He is a mix between a malamute and a timber wolf. He does not have the far away timber wolf look. This dog will engage you directly and be very happy when you pet it. This dog will shed enough to fill a blanket everyday.
So I have a lovely evening. My wife enjoys her coworkers/ friends and I get my social interaction for the year. Actually will invite a few of them over to our place in a bit. So it was a very nice evening and it laid the groundwork for a very nice future. I like living here.