Post #224,496
9/12/05 8:35:16 PM
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My cable died for an hour tonight.
I spent a bit on the phone with tech support,
she said "Yup", it's dead. Could be modem, could be
something else, who knows.
Support: We'll send someone out next Monday.
Me: (A full week?) Gasp.
Me: You sure - none sooner?
Support: Yup.
Me: Fine, could it be the modem, can I swap that?
Support: Yup - tomorrow.
Me: OK, fine, we'll try that.
The evil girl child comes home.
Me: Before you freak, cable's out.
EGC: Huh? What's that mean?
Me: No internet.
EGC: What about AIM?
Me: Nope, dead.
EGC: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
I swear, if I had evicerated her favorite cat in
from of her the reaction could not have been worse.
It was gasping, from the gut, and was continuous.
EGC: FIX IT DADDY!!!!!! FIX IT!!!!!
Me: I can't.
EGC: YES YOU CAN!!!!
Me: No I can't.
EGC: BUT YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO CAN, RIGHT!!!!
Me: No, I don't.
EGC: WHAT ABOUT UNCLE LEON?
Me: No.
EGC: WHAT ABOUT UNCLE ROBBY?
Me: No.
EGC: WHAT ABOUT THE PEOPLE YOU WORK WITH?
Me: No. Only the cable people can fix it.
EGC: YOU'RE LYING!! YOU CAN FIX IT!!! GO GET A BOOK!!!
Me: No. Only the cable people can fix it.
EGC: BUT WHY NOT NOW?!?!? GET THEM HERE!!!
Me: They are busy.
EGC: THEN GET ANOTHER CABLE COMPANY!!!
Me: There are no others who service this area.
EGC: NONONONONONONONONONONNONONNONONNONONNO!!!
EGC: PAY THEM MORE!! GET THEM FASTER!! GIVE THEM MORE
MONEY!!!!
Me: They don't care, they are booked up, and they won't
take more money.
Which is not entirely true, since I assume business class
people get faster response for double the money.
EGC: WHAT ABOUT WIRELESS!?!?! WE DON'T NEED CABLE! WE CAN
USE WIRELESS!!!
I glanced at my laptop, which was currently online, riding
off my neighbor's open wireless access point. No way am
I giving up my laptop to her.
Me: No, sorry, in order for wireless to work the cable modem
still has to work.
EGC: I WANT A NEW COMPUTER. MOMMY PROMISED ME YOU WOULD BUILD
A NEW COMPUTER FOR ME!!! I WANT IT NOW!!!
Huh? So we've shifted gears.
Me: Sorry, I have no computer for you.
EGC: MOMMY PROMISED!!!!!!
Me: Mommy lied.
EGC: THEN SHE CAN BUY ME A NEW COMPUTER!!!!!!
She calls Barb who is out for a bit, starts screaming at her.
Barb hangs up.
She calls back.
This goes on a few cycles until she stops screaming.
She gives me the phone. Barb explains that we had discussed
me building a system when I get more spare parts, but it might
be a while. I guess I forgot.
Me: Fine, I'll build you a computer when I get more pieces. Could
be a while though.
EGC: NO!!!! I WANT A WIRELESS LAPTOP NOW!!!!
Me: Too bad, you get nothing.
I'm back on the phone with Barb. Sarah glances at the computer,
and SHRIEKS. Goes running to it.
EGC: IT'S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Starts babbling about how she missed it.
Barb is still on the phone, not understanding, upset that the world
just got worse.
Me: It's like the 2nd coming of Christ.
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Post #224,499
9/12/05 8:43:55 PM
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You know what this means... (new thread)
Created as new thread #224498 titled [link|/forums/render/content/show?contentid=224498|You know what this means...]
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Post #224,507
9/12/05 9:51:54 PM
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She sounds just like
Veruca Salt from Willie Wonka!
"But I want it NOW!"
Barry, if you ever want to run away from home, we'll put you up, honey.
Oompah Loompa,
Amy
Pray for the survivors of Katrina.
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Post #224,510
9/12/05 10:13:17 PM
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I know
I just saw that movie - both versions.
The EGC is WORSE.
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Post #224,518
9/13/05 12:09:32 AM
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This whole thing reminds me how glad I am I never had kids.
Never saw much use for them in the first place.
Personally, I'd lock the little bitch in a room for a month. See how she likes that. No computer, no cell phone, nothing.
Or better yet, tell the little shit to go out and play. That'll fuck her up. Kids today don't know the meaning of the phrase. Like fish out of water. I'm begining to think most of them don't know WTF the sun is either, sitting in front of XBOX, PS, PC, etc.
Of course, I'm the same kind of person who thinks that if it got to this level in my house, justifiable homicide is most certainly an option. I've often told people I couldn't have kids because I'd probably kill them before they reached 4 years old.
No, I'm not kidding.
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Post #224,540
9/13/05 3:36:05 AM
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{the infamous Unborn-zygote thanks you, I wot.}
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Post #224,553
9/13/05 11:00:34 AM
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you want to take in my 13yo?
Gonna print this post and put it on his door saying remember that nice man from Beep's party? this is where your gonna live.
thanx,
bill
"the reason people don't buy conspiracy theories is that they think conspiracy means everyone is on the same program. Thats not how it works. Everybody has a different program. They just all want the same guy dead. Socrates was a gadfly, but I bet he took time out to screw somebodies wife" Gus Vitelli
Any opinions expressed by me are mine alone, posted from my home computer, on my own time as a free american and do not reflect the opinions of any person or company that I have had professional relations with in the past 49 years. meep
questions, help? [link|mailto:pappas@catholic.org|email pappas at catholic.org]
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Post #224,623
9/13/05 6:56:18 PM
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"nice man"?? WTF did that come from?
I've never been nice to children in the first place.
I tolerate children until they become what I preceive to be a problem. Then I find someplace else to go to get away from them before I take matters into my own hands.
No sense in talking to their parents, because it's pretty damned obvious that they have no control over them. The mealy-mouthed pleas for the child to behave are pathetic. "Oh, Johnny, please settle down.", doesn't cut it with some of these kids. You use a voice that commands attention followed by a swift kick in the ass. It's what Buford T. Justis calls "An Attention-Getter".
I've upset members of my SO's family on more than one ocassion and I'll not apologize for it.... ever.
If they were doing their job, then I wouldn't have to lift 7-year-old Brennan 3 feet off the floor by his shirt-front and hold him there in the first place. Either control him, or get him out of my face, if you want him to live.
And, yes, that's a true story. Happened about 5-6 years ago. He's 12 or 13 now.
I never hit him, slapped him, or left any mark on him. Just picked him up and held him in the air, followed by a voice (not raised) that conveyed the message that I was not going to take anymore of this. I imagine the seething glare in my eyes helped as well. The boy got the message. The kid never said or did another thing to set me off the rest of the evening.
The parents were shocked, the grandparents were shocked, but my SO didn't say much to me about it. She was getting a bit angry about it as well.
"Nice man"??? I don't friggin' think so.....
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Post #224,632
9/13/05 8:25:13 PM
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Compared to the Box, that's downright civilized. ;)
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Post #224,742
9/14/05 1:02:39 PM
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Sounds a little like my methods
Once my mom had me help her with her Sunday School class. She left the room to get something, and all of a sudden, 10 children leapt from their chairs and began racing around the room. I started grabbing one child at a time, seized the child and plopped him in his chair and said DON'T MOVE! I succeeded with each child.
Mom came back and they were all sitting there looking scared to death of me. Mom said, "What did you do?" I said, "I put them in their chairs."
Mom never asked me to help again. ;)
Brenda
"Excel is to math what a Microwave Oven is to cooking!"
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Post #224,873
9/15/05 6:03:45 PM
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Sounds.... appropriate
well, Traditional anyway.
Sunday School class is where you learn better to abandon spontaneity, eschew any nascent, fledgling Questions you might have about the Mysterious-program you've been sent to absorb - and where you get the first Formal-lessons on Never Questioning authority. As the Jesuits say, "..give me a child til age 5 --"
Nice intro to Righteousness-101; you helped a bit, too - gave them an intro to the main method of inculcation: fear. Unwittingly, of course.
(I know. I know - 'discipline 'is ~another matter; we invented that word to justify not-drowning the more rambunctious/freest amidst our fleglings. Amazing anyone ever grows up to Question Authority\ufffd at all.) er, cha cha cha
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Post #224,558
9/13/05 11:15:31 AM
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I completely relate
I can't handle children.... they make my nerves get on edge, make me breathe faster, and make me want to start climbing up walls....
No owlets for this Owl!
Brenda
"Excel is to math what a Microwave Oven is to cooking!"
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Post #224,605
9/13/05 4:46:09 PM
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That's the way I lean too
Both in my attitude towards them and my desire not to have any. Plus they're incredibly expensive. My sister has two kids, the oldest (boy) being 1.5 years old and the younger (girl) being 5-6 months old so I can get some child rearing experience if I really want some. It is interesting that my attitude hasn't changed at all since I've become an uncle. Ah well, I've got 5-7 years before I get confronted with the children issue with the girlfriend (provided no oopsies happen! (and doing my best to avoid any!))
I never did like kids even when I was one.
lister
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Post #224,619
9/13/05 6:22:30 PM
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Well, things are much more efficient without them, for one.
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Post #224,695
9/14/05 7:31:06 AM
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A small child is a noise, with dirt on it :)
Two out of three people wonder where the other one is.
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Post #224,608
9/13/05 4:59:25 PM
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Pregnancy is a parasitic infection.
Unfortunately the parasite doesn't go away after removal from the body, it just keeps on sucking blood for 18 to 24 years - or longer.
[link|http://www.aaxnet.com|AAx]
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Post #224,649
9/13/05 9:53:58 PM
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Well MY kids are perfect!
Actually, they are pretty good chips off the ol' Critter (with a generous slather of me in the mix). They have their moments, but on the whole, I'm pretty pleased with the way they are turning out. They are smart, reasonably well-liked and fairly well-adjusted. I would say they have more good points than bad. And the bad points, well, Critter and I just try to turn those into something good.
The main thing is, I like my kids for who they are. I actually get a kick out of their personalities. Yeah, sometimes they get on my last nerve, but that is just their way of testing the waters of independence. And God knows, I want them to become independent!
So, yay for my kids. (Their shit does stink, but at least they know how to spray the Lysol). :-D
Peace,
Amy
Pray for the survivors of Katrina.
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Post #224,700
9/14/05 9:26:29 AM
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That's how I viewed pregnancy
And when I really sat and thought about having a separate living entity inside me I would get queasy. I was not one of those glowing pregnant women. I was one of those 'get this damn thing out of me" women.
But now that they're out I cant imagine life without them. Sure, they cost me an arm and a leg, they give me more stress than I care to deal with, they whine, they cry, they fight and they make messes.
But my life would be empty without them. There is nothing like a little one spontaneously wrapping their arms around you and saying I love you. Or watching them sleep. Or watching them ride a bike for the first time or open presents Christmas morning. There's a million things that make being a parent the best thing in the world. It's awesome.
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Post #224,719
9/14/05 10:39:20 AM
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That's not all!
One day they'll bring you grandchildren. Now that's a relationship with more positives and fewer negatives.
Alex
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. -- Bertrand Russell
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Post #224,531
9/13/05 1:59:22 AM
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You have no idea what you just offered
I have come to believe that idealism without discipline is a quick road to disaster, while discipline without idealism is pointless. -- Aaron Ward (my brother)
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Post #224,522
9/13/05 12:40:37 AM
9/13/05 12:47:33 AM
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Imagine if she had a "REAL" crisis...
I would be planning a "mission trip" in her future. Maybe some charity work in a shelter or something. She needs to understand how the other 90% live. Perhaps if she had to live the garage for a week or two, with no shower or bath.
I made the mistake recently of getting cable TV. I've had cable Internet for a while, but they made an offer last May where they would give me basic cable with my Internet for $5 LESS a month.
I thought it would be cool to have Discovery, The History Channel, CNN, ESPN, etc. But now we have only 4 Channels: Disney, Cartoon Network, Nick, and Kids WB. Unless the kids are in bed, both TVs are on one of the 4 stations.
We kept Netflix, thinking it would be the "Mommy Daddy" movie. My son changes the Queue, and the last 5 movies have been kid movies.
We're taking "extreme" measures, having physically unplugged the cable from the wall or back of the TV twice in the last week. Basically, if the kids won't come to dinner, or do their chores, then the cable is turned "off" for the day. We get some whining, but they eventually comply.
My work is so busy, and hers is so busy, that we don't have time for movies anyway. We should probably just save the $10 a month.
So, I have a strong willed child, but when he figures out I mean business, then he falls into line. Actually, he's a model citizen at school and church. There, I have to worry about the middle and the youngest. They act like angels when parents are around, then attempt to "eat out" the pantry if we go upstairs to work. I've been thinking about locking the pantry with a key lock. Our freezer locks. If only the fridge would lock and we would be set.
The doc recommended a book called "Parenting with Love and Logic", so maybe I need to buy it.
Glen Austin
Edited by gdaustin
Sept. 13, 2005, 12:47:33 AM EDT
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Post #224,524
9/13/05 12:58:49 AM
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That's "extreme"??
TV should be the exception, not the rule.
Regards,
-scott anderson
"Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson..."
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Post #224,525
9/13/05 1:11:05 AM
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Re: Imagine if she had a "REAL" crisis...
The doc recommended a book called "Parenting with Love and Logic", so maybe I need to buy it. There's some great practical advice in that book. As with any book of that type, though, it depends on the kid. I'd say a lot of kids would respond well to the techniques they propose (my son did), but some won't. Just like some won't respond to anything but a swift kick in the ass. --
Steve
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Post #224,529
9/13/05 1:27:56 AM
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we don't have cable either...
for many of the same reasons. What we do have is a collection of videos (on tape and disc). The pause/stop button works really well. It took a little bit to convince them that when they come for dinner, they really aren't going to miss anything. And yes, the movie will continue exactly where it is in the morning. That and the vast majority of stuff on the broadcast networks isn't worth seeing to begin with. Books, toys and games are much better alternatives.
Parenting with Love and Logic is an excellent book. I also recommend [link|http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0060014318|"kids are worth it!"] by Barbara Coloroso. Hmmm, I just noticed that those two books are sitting next to each other in my bookcase. Might be time for me to read them again...
Have fun,
Carl Forde
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Post #224,530
9/13/05 1:42:50 AM
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I can vouch
for the Parenting with Love and Logic book. I had the good fortune to actually hear Foster Kline give the lecture. It really puts things in their proper perspective.
I love how he relates discipline to being a cop. A cop ordinarily doesn't shout at you when you break the law. He calmly tells you the infraction, deals with you with a modicum of respect and how many times have you thanked a cop when he gave you a ticket?
If you can deal with your kid in that way, it takes the emotion out of things and bases itself in fact. Cause and effect, freedom and responsibility.
Really helped me when I was first navigating the parental waters.
Peace,
Amy
Pray for the survivors of Katrina.
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Post #224,721
9/14/05 10:40:27 AM
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I'm reading that book right now
So far, it makes a lot of sense.
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Post #226,381
9/25/05 4:06:19 PM
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Re: My cable died for an hour tonight.
I glanced at my laptop, which was currently online, riding off my neighbor's open wireless access point. No way am I giving up my laptop to her.
So you have no moral or ethical problems with STEALING Internet access from your neighbor? Figures. lincoln
"Chicago to my mind was the only place to be. ... I above all liked the city because it was filled with people all a-bustle, and the clatter of hooves and carriages, and with delivery wagons and drays and peddlers and the boom and clank of freight trains. And when those black clouds came sailing in from the west, pouring thunderstorms upon us so that you couldn't hear the cries or curses of humankind, I liked that best of all. Chicago could stand up to the worst God had to offer. I understood why it was built--a place for trade, of course, with railroads and ships and so on, but mostly to give all of us a magnitude of defiance that is not provided by one house on the plains. And the plains is where those storms come from." -- E.L. Doctorow
Never apply a Star Trek solution to a Babylon 5 problem.
[link|mailto:bconnors@ev1.net|contact me]
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Post #226,383
9/25/05 4:20:27 PM
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Already have permission
So there!
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