Only a fool (or one who has never been married) thinks that its all wine and roses. It does take "work" if one extends the word "work" to include not taking each other for granted - as you noted somewhere in this horrendous thread. But, do you think an 11 yo would "get" that?

But that does not speak to how I "chose" my wife. If I understand you correctly, you do not believe that it is possible for a person to have the experience I had. But I did have it, so it is very "real" to me. (This reminds me of a conversation we had years ago at IWE concerning religion).