Not saying that at all...

Post #129,271 by gdaustin 12/6/03 11:12:39 AM Reply	Not saying that at all... I've learned a few new words from Ashton, I do still read his posts. Peter and I seem to get along fine. You and I have had words, but we've learned to respect each other, and mostly stay out of each other's way. You're smart Ross, I know that. You just have a lot of venom that keeps you from interacting with people at any kind of deep and meaningful level. Same with Peter. The way you interact with people scares many away. Nightowl is a different sort of person. Reasonably smart, maybe a little older, very insecure, very sensitive. Where I don't really give a damn if someone calls me an idiot, it does hurt her feelings. I think this forum is good for her, because she's learning to be less sensitive, especially in "online relationships", and that's a good thing. Online relationships are never a substitute for Real Life. Owl, find real people to interact with, even if they aren't on this board. Glen Austin
Post #129,274 by Nightowl 12/6/03 11:15:28 AM Reply	Real people Trust me Glen, I have a lot of real people, relatives, church people, and friends from Affinity that I interact with and I'm learning to apply the same strategies with them that I'm applying here. :) I'm working on being less insecure, and less sensitive, but I still don't like people to cuss at me. Nightowl >8# "The difference between being immature and child-like is that one is what you are, and one is what you choose to be." Comment by Nightowl {O,O}
Post #129,305 by Ashton 12/6/03 4:09:08 PM Reply	Re: Not saying that at all... As to Ross's putative ... that keeps you from interacting with people at any kind of deep and meaningful level. Maybe you just skim. A lot. There's plenty of material to counter such a simplistic encapsulation. I demur. Esp. for his also being math/physics oriented on a virtuoso level - that is utterly to miss the exchanges, esp. re music: than which there is NO "deeper, [more] meaningful" revelation of the poet within anyone. And someone who can find such "words about" music is certainly not looking-it-up in the dictionary; it comes from the Heart. Personally, I don't give a shit if Ross is moody? occasionally abrasive and sometimes off-the-wall - I'll put up with a Lot for originality and at least occasional competent and incisive commentary (even when I disagree with certain premises - then often enough, say so - if the topic is also an Interest of my own.) If.. you're going to 'characterize' someone, at least characterize comprehensively. Ross has been here forever - and if that's all you can 'say', please look first to your own inattention. Go look up 'Glenn Gould', for just one. As for this current one-of-a new series of teapot tempests over the proper care and feeding of feathered creatures with perpetually broken wings: I feel no Need.. 'to be liked by Everyone' nor either to be 'excused' ('cause I be so Fragile) whenever I react too- harshly to real or imagined provocations and receive ripostes. I accept the requisite choosing-off on Any Topic, as adults (used to) do. (If I thought I were Right all the time, I'd be marlowe2.) OTOH I'm also not about to dumb-down to the level of contemporary naifs as bleed from mere skin-contact with Different Views of 'contemporary habits'. I am aware that there exist politely vapid environments, frequented by the lovers of euphemism - wherein every Hard Subject is deemed 'controversial and disallowed'. A 'moderator' shall ensure that only niceness about trivia shall happen there. Alien world; can't imagine zIWE ever opting for castration. I'll take warts over.. broad spectrum antibiotics. Or over, Kenny G plays Monteverdi on Elimidate. Cheers, I.
Post #129,313 by gdaustin 12/6/03 5:40:29 PM 12/6/03 5:53:15 PM Reply	Relating to people vs. music.... Ashton, I agree that Ross is a deep person. I understand a lot of his fears. I have the same ones. But, Ross also is closed in that he doesn't "deal well" with people who aren't like him. I guess maybe I'm being somewhat unfair because most people don't deal well with people who aren't like them. I feel like I do a "decent" job, but maybe, really, I don't either. (And I'm just fooling myself.) Ross' rich understanding of music I appreciate. I listen to Rachmanimanoff (even if I can't spell it). Tchaikovksy, Beethoven, Mozart, Verdi. His understanding of physics and math, and even computers mean that he's smart. I'm not disputing that one bit. But, smart people often have trouble relating to others, especially those who might not be quite as bright. Even I have people at work that simply drive me nuts, because they're supposed to be a C++ or EDI expert (and paid to do so), and they are clueless. And when those people succeed and you get poorer it pisses you off. It does me. Ross has had some bad stuff happen, I admit that. And I'm sorry about his medical problems. And I get depressed like he does (even when I have a job). But my wife and church get me to focus, and eventually I can get the airplane out of the nose dive, and back to level flight. I'm certainly not asking for "dumb down" conversation, I can handle what Ashton/Peter/Ross/Scott/Greg/RCareaga/Boxley throw at me. And you don't have to even be nice. I'm pretty thick skinned. But Owl is different, sensitive. Maybe part of it is the gender, but she's wired to trust people, to converse on a plane of mutual respect and dignity, that perhaps us "NFL-style", "WWF style" boys aren't. And I get a little disappointed with us "rough and tumble" boys when we relate to women poorly. We can get a little pugilistic at times, and I've been a part of those fights (but probably not for a long while). Anyway, that's my two cents. Ross is deep, maybe even more so than the average person, but he doesn't trust/like people very much at all. And a lot may be justified as he's had a tough road. Glen Austin Edited by gdaustin Dec. 6, 2003, 05:53:15 PM EST Expand All History
Post #129,318 by Ashton 12/6/03 6:15:05 PM Reply	Umm.. well said. Nothing to disagree with, there. I don't think I can add anything to it, either. (And I'll admit that, certain styles of er sensitivity are apt to temporarily discombobulate my own compassion gene, too.. it sorta issues a CRC-error; or even Tears Overrun in AX, BX if'n ya knows what I mean ;-) [link\|http://www.opuscds.com/cd/33093\| Pace pace O Mio Dio] Perhaps appropriately, from (La forza del destino) :-\ufffd
Post #129,448 by orion 12/7/03 3:55:28 PM Reply	I've gotten used to it people like Ross and Peter can still be friends with me despite all the words we have had with each other. I am very forgiving, and in a way the negative feedback shows me areas that I need improving on. So it is not useless. *"Lady I only speak two languages, English and Bad English!" - Corbin Dallas "The Fifth Element"*

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