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New I wish I could say that they're made up. Have experienced
way too many, and can almost identify a similar experience in most of the "stories".

My best one is the programmer who's progam took 12 hours each night to run. One night ops didn't get it scheduled and started it at 6:00 a.m. Shut down effective company operations for the entire day (the response time was measured in minutes), on a IBM mainframe. Ops asked me to review code to see if it could be modified to run more efficiently. When I was done, the program took only 20 minutes, during the day, to run....

COBOL program. Without using actual code here's what was originally coded:

Open Updates File
Read Updates File
Do Until Updates EOF
...For x = 1 to 20
......Open Customer File
......Find Customer Record
......Update Field(X)
......Rewrite Customer Record
......Close Customer File
...Next X
...Read Update File
Loop
Close Updates File
Stop

And this was from programmer who was considered a good programmer!


A good friend will come and bail you out of jail ... but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"
New That is bloody awful.
--\n-------------------------------------------------------------------\n* Jack Troughton                            jake at consultron.ca *\n* [link|http://consultron.ca|http://consultron.ca]                   [link|irc://irc.ecomstation.ca|irc://irc.ecomstation.ca] *\n* Kingston Ontario Canada               [link|news://news.consultron.ca|news://news.consultron.ca] *\n-------------------------------------------------------------------
New now you know why they were made of iron
Have fun,
Carl Forde
     From Shark Tank - (jbrabeck) - (5)
         And today's doesn't bode well, either - (Ashton) - (4)
             ICLRPD. (new thread) - (Another Scott)
             I wish I could say that they're made up. Have experienced - (jbrabeck) - (2)
                 That is bloody awful. -NT - (jake123)
                 now you know why they were made of iron -NT - (cforde)

The parents are generally the last to know.
80 ms