as I see it, you have a few options:
1- accept the situation
2- move work closer to home
3- move home closer to work
4- reduced hours at work
1 seems to be a non-starter. Ok, you're exploring 2; what about 3? is that possible or desirable for other reasons? or what about option 4, say 6hr/day with an occasional Saturday? Perhaps a job share?
Do what you need to stay sane. You're clear on your priorities, make your situation fit them not the other way around. Yeah, I know. Easy to say. Let us know how you're doing. We're a good group to bounce ideas off of. I've been been told I'm pretty dense on occasion; so I think that will help...