Actually I did ask for opinions prior to making decision

I asked some female coworkers and friends. They all said that I should go with my daughter to encourage/build our relationship.

I posted here to get the "male" (most of the Iwetheyers are male) opinion. You, the group, validated my decision. As I said, I could see it from her point. And after I got back, it was very obvious that my wife wasn't so much mad as hurt.

Yes, Doug, I have sought advice, professional, friends, church, and here. I know my choices and options. Somehow I manage to keep looking on (for) the bright side.

I really do appreciate all the comments, both good and bad. I need BOTH to make informed decisions. As usual, I retain the right to make bad decisions just because I want to make a bad decision. :-)

My friend Bill lived with him for a while. Hangs out with him a couple of days a week now. I see him occasionally, help with his computers, play with his dog. Bill travels with him to Olympic events, and spends a lot of time at his shore house and the AC casinos.

This guy has literally dozens of women going after him. He can't leave his phone on during a date because 4 or 5 will call.

For a while I went over his house to feed his dog Zeus. Great Dane. Outweighed me. Stood higher than me.

And occasionally we play ping pong. He tapes the paddle to his hand. Stays in 1 position in his wheel chair. And can reach both side of the table with the single hand. Quickly. Can play forehand and backhand just as well. And manages to drop the ball on my side the farthest possible distance from me. I run my ass off.

I have a really good spinning serve that sometimes can get by him. Other than that, I cheat. There is a certain point near the net he can't reach. So I try to lightly drop the ball right there.

Post #161,123 by jbrabeck 6/22/04 9:07:49 PM Reply	Actually I did ask for opinions prior to making decision I asked some female coworkers and friends. They all said that I should go with my daughter to encourage/build our relationship. I posted here to get the "male" (most of the Iwetheyers are male) opinion. You, the group, validated my decision. As I said, I could see it from her point. And after I got back, it was very obvious that my wife wasn't so much mad as hurt. Yes, Doug, I have sought advice, professional, friends, church, and here. I know my choices and options. Somehow I manage to keep looking on (for) the bright side. I really do appreciate all the comments, both good and bad. I need BOTH to make informed decisions. As usual, I retain the right to make bad decisions just because I want to make a bad decision. :-)
Post #161,150 by ben_tilly 6/22/04 11:59:18 PM Reply	You asked opinions. Did you ask for HER opinion? Nowhere in the list of people you asked is there a sign that you asked your wife's opinion. The act of discussing a decision, even when you know how you'll make it, is often a valuable exercise. Sure, it may be obvious what decision you'll come to. And if the case was presented to her, she may obviously agree with your decision. But talking with her first tells her that you care about her opinion. Not talking with her first says that you don't care about her opinion. Doing things that she can perceive as saying that you don't care about her is never a good thing. Keep her in the loop. Even if you are willing to override anything she says in this particular case. Cheers, Ben To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court]
Post #161,153 by dmarker 6/23/04 12:48:55 AM Reply	I thought this whole exercise was in response to her opinion I think Joe spelled it out in two ways. At the start he highlighted his dilema & why it was so, esp in realtion to wife's reaction. In his most recent posts he showed he cared about his wife's opinion & it seems he is doing the delicate dance needed to now smooth out her need for reassurance. I was happy to participate, felt his Father's day dinner choice was good & am sure he will now swing his attention to dealing with his wife's needs. I don't mind a bit of real life challenges floating through the forums. We all have an opportunity to see how others think about things & that in turn polishes our own thinking. Cheers Doug _________________________________________________________ "Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!". -- Leonardo Da Vinci
Post #161,161 by jbrabeck 6/23/04 6:50:46 AM Reply	Yes, I did ask her opinion and as Doug pointed out, her reaction was that it was rude of my daughter to exclude her (wife). And that she would NEVER do that to me, and would NEVER allow her daughters to even ask her out without including me. (of course since they don't drive and she doesn't drive, I usually HAVE to be included)
Post #161,166 by boxley 6/23/04 8:42:52 AM Reply	sticks snout into your business My mother never drove until my father had a stroke at age 40, we both learned to drive at the same time. My wife was afraid to drive and it took a couple of years before I got her behind the wheel. Gently force her to learn as the ability to take keys in hand and go somewhere NOW is a very self confidence building ability. Suggest she learn and ask her who is going to drive you to the docs when you get incapacitated. thanx, bill Anchorage AK: House for sale 3 bed 1 bath 1440 sq feet huge lot near Cheney Lake 175K FSBO 813.273.3518 I wondered what Darwinian moment had to effect itself before we devolved from children flying paper flags in the sky to half formed creatures thundering in a wall of horns down the road to Roncevaux. James Lee Burke questions, help? [link\|mailto:pappas@catholic.org\|email pappas at catholic.org]
Post #161,240 by jbrabeck 6/23/04 2:21:42 PM Reply	She is handicapped. Doesn't have any strength in right leg. Could never move leg from accerator to brake to stop in case of emergency. She was looking forward to learning prior to her injury. Her ex had refused to allow her to drive/take the test, so she never learned. I was starting to teach her when she fell. She was an excellent bus navigator, now she cannot get to the bus stop (1/2 mile away). Oldest daughter has gotten her license and could take mom in an emergency.
Post #161,241 by boxley 6/23/04 2:23:14 PM Reply	put the acellerator and brake on the column but they do get pricey thanx bill Anchorage AK: House for sale 3 bed 1 bath 1440 sq feet huge lot near Cheney Lake 175K FSBO 813.273.3518 I wondered what Darwinian moment had to effect itself before we devolved from children flying paper flags in the sky to half formed creatures thundering in a wall of horns down the road to Roncevaux. James Lee Burke questions, help? [link\|mailto:pappas@catholic.org\|email pappas at catholic.org]
Post #161,242 by broomberg 6/23/04 2:25:38 PM Reply	I have a friend who is a quad Some functionality in the arms, poor motor control in the hands. He drives. He also is a mean ping pong player. Sometimes I am amazed and proud that I beat a quadrapalegic. I'm sweating bullets when we are done.
Post #161,243 by jbrabeck 6/23/04 2:27:46 PM Reply	For the times that she would need to drive -- too expensive. Cheaper to get daughter or friend or even mobility taxi.
Post #161,249 by ben_tilly 6/23/04 3:01:36 PM Reply	Too bad there's no ping-pong table at beeps :-( To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court]
Post #161,270 by boxley 6/23/04 5:19:47 PM Reply	why you wanna try to beat the quad? :-) drunks and ping pong dont mix thanx, bill Anchorage AK: House for sale 3 bed 1 bath 1440 sq feet huge lot near Cheney Lake 175K FSBO 813.273.3518 I wondered what Darwinian moment had to effect itself before we devolved from children flying paper flags in the sky to half formed creatures thundering in a wall of horns down the road to Roncevaux. James Lee Burke questions, help? [link\|mailto:pappas@catholic.org\|email pappas at catholic.org]
Post #161,272 by ChrisR 6/23/04 5:23:27 PM Reply	Drunks go with pool tables... ...cause you can use the table and/or poolstick to keep from falling over.
Post #161,273 by ben_tilly 6/23/04 5:23:54 PM Reply	Even drunk I beat most people handily I'm not very good at ping-pong. I've met good, and know that I don't have any hope of being there. But to the general public, I'll pass. Cheers, Ben To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court]
Post #161,300 by broomberg 6/23/04 6:46:26 PM Reply	He's Good [link\|http://www.dougheir.com/index.html\|http://www.dougheir.com/index.html] [link\|http://www.dougheir.com/PhotoGallery1/\|http://www.dougheir.com/PhotoGallery1/] I should have included him in my famous people list.
Post #161,302 by boxley 6/23/04 7:05:39 PM Reply	yea he is. Anchorage AK: House for sale 3 bed 1 bath 1440 sq feet huge lot near Cheney Lake 175K FSBO 813.273.3518 I wondered what Darwinian moment had to effect itself before we devolved from children flying paper flags in the sky to half formed creatures thundering in a wall of horns down the road to Roncevaux. James Lee Burke questions, help? [link\|mailto:pappas@catholic.org\|email pappas at catholic.org]
Post #161,316 by ben_tilly 6/23/04 8:28:46 PM Reply	I'm impressed To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court]
Post #161,321 by broomberg 6/23/04 9:01:09 PM Reply	You should try to lift his bag of medals My friend Bill lived with him for a while. Hangs out with him a couple of days a week now. I see him occasionally, help with his computers, play with his dog. Bill travels with him to Olympic events, and spends a lot of time at his shore house and the AC casinos. This guy has literally dozens of women going after him. He can't leave his phone on during a date because 4 or 5 will call. For a while I went over his house to feed his dog Zeus. Great Dane. Outweighed me. Stood higher than me. And occasionally we play ping pong. He tapes the paddle to his hand. Stays in 1 position in his wheel chair. And can reach both side of the table with the single hand. Quickly. Can play forehand and backhand just as well. And manages to drop the ball on my side the farthest possible distance from me. I run my ass off. I have a really good spinning serve that sometimes can get by him. Other than that, I cheat. There is a certain point near the net he can't reach. So I try to lightly drop the ball right there.
Post #161,322 by ben_tilly 6/23/04 9:02:44 PM Reply	Think he'd be up for a game Friday night? Say, about 10PM or so? Ben To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court]
Post #161,323 by broomberg 6/23/04 9:04:03 PM Reply	No He'll be on a date, or on the way to the casino with Bill.
Post #161,325 by broomberg 6/23/04 9:08:40 PM 6/23/04 11:58:35 PM Reply	Begone
Post #161,332 by ben_tilly 6/23/04 9:30:24 PM 6/24/04 12:00:05 AM Reply	Gracias To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court] Edited by ben_tilly June 24, 2004, 12:00:05 AM EDT Expand All History
Post #161,342 by broomberg 6/23/04 10:11:34 PM Reply	Hey admin!!! Please, important. Wipe out the above post.
Post #161,357 by admin 6/24/04 12:01:12 AM Reply	Bleh. Y'all owe me for this one. Regards, -scott anderson "Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson..."
Post #161,359 by broomberg 6/24/04 12:04:52 AM Reply	Agreed
Post #161,369 by Ashton 6/24/04 1:12:22 AM Reply	{cackle}_____{cackle}___Ah... IWE____________{glorp}
Post #161,368 by ben_tilly 6/24/04 1:11:12 AM Reply	Indeed I do One bottomless beer coming up at beeps ifn you want it. Thanks, Ben To deny the indirect purchaser, who in this case is the ultimate purchaser, the right to seek relief from unlawful conduct, would essentially remove the word consumer from the Consumer Protection Act - [link\|http://www.techworld.com/opsys/news/index.cfm?NewsID=1246&Page=1&pagePos=20\|Nebraska Supreme Court]
Post #161,393 by broomberg 6/24/04 8:03:35 AM Reply	No, that's what he does to you
Post #161,402 by folkert 6/24/04 9:08:48 AM Reply	With prodding from someone else... He almost gave up early. -- [link\|mailto:greg@gregfolkert.net\|greg], [link\|http://www.iwethey.org/ed_curry\|REMEMBER ED CURRY!] @ *i_wethey* Heard near the SCOG employee entry/exit way: `Security: We got another Mass Exodus Doorway Jam.`

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