Besides, OK City knew that another offer was on the table and that the salary offered was above theirs; yet they chose to remain firm and not counter at all. On top of it, they have refused to bend on the 6 month expiration date for the relo package, offered no signing bonus or cash towards temporary living expenses, and have admitted that their annual reviews are running 2 - 3 months behind schedule. They pushed for a fast answer to their offer, not leaving me time to investigate any other options, let alone barely enough time to see their city in person.
I had to give a quick response to the OK City firm, otherwise the offer would have been pulled off the table. That would have left me with the choice of taking the job in Georgia or staying unemployed. Didn't want to risk the loss of my options, so I said yes to OK City while I check out the other place. Since my wife works, she can't just take a few days off and zoom around the country with me to check out potential cities. Again, I'm leaning towards the company in GA but towards the town of OK City (smaller versus larger).
However, my instincts have been proven wrong before, so any sense that the company in GA will be more relaxed, less stressful, etc., could be nothing more than wishful thinking. Simply put, if my wife thinks the town sucks, then I politely turn them down and go with OK City. If she says that she can tolerate it for a year or two, then we'll discuss it and reach a final decision.
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They may be telling other recruits they've filled the position, retract ads, etc.
I've had firms in the past contact me, saying that their "first choice changed his or her mind and was I still interested"? They're not out any money other than what they have already spent to bring in candidates from around the country before me.
If I have to go back to them and say "I received another offer that beats yours by A, B and C", I'm pretty sure that they'll continue to act like they're in the driver's seat and give me a "take it or leave it" ultimatum and make no changes to their total package. I believe that once you take a cut in pay, you're forever playing catch-up IMHO, and I don't foresee the economy improving in the next few years so that I can make up the cut from my last salary to where they want me to start by jumping to another company. And anybody who thinks that OK City is a cheap town to live in hasn't seen what's available through realtor.com; it has homes starting at $100 - $110 per sq ft, no formal living rooms, tiny bedrooms, no basements for tornado protection, no gamerooms for the kids, etc. The houses I've built or purchased in Texas were much bigger, better trimmed out, and for way less dollars per sq ft., so I guess that I got spoiled down here.