We get audited occasionally.
Real security gurus.
Hah!
They want to know why we don't have virus scanning software on our Linux systems.
Fucking idiots.
We have been forced to install ClamAV on 100% isolated linux systems - no email, no Samba, etc, so we can nod and say we have virus scanning on our Linux boxes.
And then we have the reverse, to most stupid stuff on our windows systems. And the Windows admin pulls out the MS tech bulletin that tells him to do it. So they nod, and tell us OK.