Perhaps an army of zombie slaves, to be commanded by Commandant Ircbot... Maybe later.
Oooh! Mercenaries! Make a website showing your claim to the throne, etc, with a spot for donations... And a 'recruiters' link - send that to a page where (for a nominal fee) you can evaluate the cracking-competency of applicants... Those that 'pass', get a hefty cut (of the net, of course!) in return for 'assignments' - like cowing rebellious provinces (K5). Don't forget to put in a bunch of porno popups (We can determine what sites we wish to affiliate with later - who wouldn't want to be know as pornsite to the Crown?) - mercenaries like camp 'followers'...
Spam campains will win over the general populace - we can simply set up an MLM email scheme where the Government ALWAYS sits atop the pyramid. If a citizen buys into that, we can make it part of thier job to praise our regime... Remember, if we make our claims outrageous enough, the people go along with it, 'just in case' our claims are true. And this might only be the beginning!
Have I not proved myself a worthy Grand Vizier?