Things that read like an Onion article

[link|http://www.palmbeachpost.com/localnews/content/local_news/epaper/2007/07/10/0710bookban.html|PalmBeach Post]

Eighty books in high school library stacks are corrupting students with tales of abortion, homosexuality and atheism. That's according to a West Palm Beach mother who has appealed to the school board to remove the books from the shelves of Dreyfoos and Royal Palm Beach high schools.

Lopez admits she hasn't read a single one of the objectionable books cover-to-cover.

In her appeal, she quotes scripture and blames the Columbine school shootings, drugs, bullies, teenage pregnancy and other ills on what she considers the removal of God from schools.

So, she went to the computerized card catalogue and typed in the keywords "homosexuality," "abortion" and "atheism." She was shocked by the dozens of titles that popped up.

"My kids are going to school to learn, not to become a homosexual or an abortion doctor or an atheist," she said.

Really has to be read, the Onion would have trouble doing better.

Jay

Post #288,755 by JayMehaffey 7/12/07 8:41:18 AM Reply	Things that read like an Onion article [link\|http://www.palmbeachpost.com/localnews/content/local_news/epaper/2007/07/10/0710bookban.html\|PalmBeach Post] Eighty books in high school library stacks are corrupting students with tales of abortion, homosexuality and atheism. That's according to a West Palm Beach mother who has appealed to the school board to remove the books from the shelves of Dreyfoos and Royal Palm Beach high schools. Lopez admits she hasn't read a single one of the objectionable books cover-to-cover. In her appeal, she quotes scripture and blames the Columbine school shootings, drugs, bullies, teenage pregnancy and other ills on what she considers the removal of God from schools. So, she went to the computerized card catalogue and typed in the keywords "homosexuality," "abortion" and "atheism." She was shocked by the dozens of titles that popped up. "My kids are going to school to learn, not to become a homosexual or an abortion doctor or an atheist," she said. Really has to be read, the Onion would have trouble doing better. Jay
Post #288,757 by jbrabeck 7/12/07 8:55:59 AM Reply	I like the last two lines Even within her own home, reaction is split. "My oldest son doesn't believe in God," she said. "I guess he kind of thinks I'm stupid." says it all... A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. (Herm Albright)
Post #288,768 by a6l6e6x 7/12/07 9:49:03 AM Reply	So, there's hope! :) Alex Nobody has a more sacred obligation to obey the law than those who make the law. -- Sophocles (496? - 406 BCE)
Post #288,786 by warmachine 7/12/07 12:23:24 PM Reply	Does that include the Old Testament? There are some really, shocking stories in that book. Shouldn't expose children to that stuff. Matthew Greet Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin' else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got heroin? - Mark Renton, Trainspotting.

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