Post #288,727
7/11/07 7:46:25 PM
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Had a visit from the county sheriffsdept this evening
Was handed a summons. SOMEONE doesnt want to pay child support anymore and is taking me to court. Just when I start to crawl out of this post divorce and post unemployment debt, the bastard slams me again. And I'll have court costs and attorney fees to pay, too.
I wish he would go away.
I am mightily stressed.
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Post #288,729
7/11/07 7:53:14 PM
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He doesn't have a leg to stand on
My sister-in-law's ex-dork tried the same crap. He also tried things like getting a crap job and trying to claim he didn't have to money to pay support, and so on. Denied, with prejuidice.
Regards,
-scott anderson
"Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson..."
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Post #288,730
7/11/07 7:53:14 PM
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Thoughts are with you
That can't be a good situation. I feel for you. :(
-YendorMike
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
- Benjamin Franklin, 1759 Historical Review of Pennsylvania
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Post #288,731
7/11/07 7:53:29 PM
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hope the judge reams him a new one
Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
Any opinions expressed by me are mine alone, posted from my home computer, on my own time as a free american and do not reflect the opinions of any person or company that I have had professional relations with in the past 51 years. meep
reach me at [link|mailto:bill.oxley@cox.net|mailto:bill.oxley@cox.net]
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Post #288,733
7/11/07 8:04:53 PM
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Bummer.
You'll win if it goes forward. Get some help to make sure he doesn't try it again.
Hang in there. Make some ice cream. :-)
Cheers,
Scott.
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Post #288,736
7/11/07 9:15:21 PM
7/11/07 9:15:37 PM
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Michigan does *NOT* look to kindly...
on shenanigans like this.
He'll fall on his face once the judge sees/hears him.
--
[link|mailto:greg@gregfolkert.net|greg],
[link|http://www.iwethey.org/ed_curry|REMEMBER ED CURRY!] @ iwethey
PGP key: 1024D/B524687C 2003-08-05
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Edited by folkert
July 11, 2007, 09:15:37 PM EDT
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Post #288,739
7/11/07 11:16:39 PM
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Sending good vibes your way!
Too much of today's music is fashionable crap dressed as artistry.Adrian Belew
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Post #288,741
7/11/07 11:40:06 PM
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Good Luck
He SUCKS BIG TIME
"Pictures are better then words because some words are big and hard to understand"
Peter Griffin (Family Guy)
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Post #288,743
7/12/07 1:17:27 AM
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I'm kinda on the other side of the line.
Since I currently pay child support for my son as he lives with his mother.
There is a kind of dichotomy with child support because its rights and obligations are treated entirely separate from issues of access and visitation by the non-custodial parent. I imagine your ex might be having problems with that. Heck, *I* have problems with that! It's a struggle and a drain to maintain contacts with her so I can see my son and it feels so wrong that the payments can't be used as a negotiating chip. But they simply can't.
Wade.
Is it enough to love
Is it enough to breathe
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
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Is it enough to die
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be Anything but Ordinary
Please
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-- "Anything but Ordinary" by Avril Lavigne. | · my ·
· [link|http://staticsan.livejournal.com/|blog] ·
· [link|http://yceran.org/|website] · |
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Post #288,746
7/12/07 6:29:59 AM
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Money as a bargaining chip is very abusable
I don't think Lily's ex wants to visit his children anyway.
Alas, if child support payments could be used as a bargaining chip, the non-custodian could dictate terms. He who pays the piper calls the tune. If the non-custodian withheld money, the custodian could respond by denying access but guess which parent has to deal with the suffering child and various, practical consequences? Indeed, in the battle of the sexes in general, guess who blinks first rather than let the child suffer?
Yes, I know what we have now is the custodian messing around the non-custodian. It's bad in the UK as well. So, attach payment to access and the non-custodian can abuse this to have his way; disconnect them and the custodian can abuse it to have her way. I'd go with the latter, myself, as people starve less.
Matthew Greet
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin' else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got heroin?
- Mark Renton, Trainspotting.
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Post #288,776
7/12/07 10:23:39 AM
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I know: it's pretty much no-win however you dice it.
Making the 'lose' the least unpalatable gets us to where we are today.
Knowing human nature, if Lily's ex doesn't want to visit the kids, that would be likely why he doesn't want to pay support. Some people can't understand it doesn't work that way...
Wade.
Is it enough to love
Is it enough to breathe
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
| |
Is it enough to die
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be Anything but Ordinary
Please
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-- "Anything but Ordinary" by Avril Lavigne. | · my ·
· [link|http://staticsan.livejournal.com/|blog] ·
· [link|http://yceran.org/|website] · |
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Post #288,817
7/12/07 8:43:29 PM
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I understand
I would be thrilled if my ex made our kids a priority. I would love for him to see them more often. I have never withheld visitation or denied his infrequent requests to visit with the kids,even though sometimes this is very difficult for me. His absence has had a debilitating effect on them. I wish things were different, but they're not. He made choices and my kids carry the burden, and that's not fair. He left me with the sole responsibility of raising our children. That's not fair either. But he did it.
He cant dismiss his obligations simply because he is tired of paying. I wont let him neglect them.
I know it is very painful to be away from your son. If I was separated from my children I would break. Fight like hell to be an active parent in his life, regardless of how difficult his mom may be.
I guess in the best situation both parents would put aside their difference and make choices based on what is best for their children. This is the kind of divorce I hoped for. It's not what I got.
So off I go to court. I spoke with my attorney today and meet with her next week to start the paperwork to counter sue.
I hate this, but the only way out is through.
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Post #288,829
7/12/07 10:05:16 PM
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Litigation, n. . . .
. . A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. -Ambrose Bierce.
I'm really sorry you have to go through this painful but pointless exercise.
[link|http://www.aaxnet.com|AAx]
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Post #288,754
7/12/07 8:39:01 AM
7/12/07 8:39:50 AM
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Depending upon how the judge rules
consider sueing him for your costs.
edit: fixed tpyo - too aerlie in da mronnig
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. (Herm Albright)
Edited by jbrabeck
July 12, 2007, 08:39:50 AM EDT
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Post #288,766
7/12/07 9:36:19 AM
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May it go well for you!
Alex
Nobody has a more sacred obligation to obey the law than those who make the law. -- Sophocles (496? - 406 BCE)
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Post #288,767
7/12/07 9:47:14 AM
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That sucks. See if the judge will raise his support payments
-----------------------------------------
Atheism is a religion in the same sense that not collecting stamps is a hobby.
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Post #288,772
7/12/07 10:08:05 AM
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Its in Michigan, the Judge probably will.
--
[link|mailto:greg@gregfolkert.net|greg],
[link|http://www.iwethey.org/ed_curry|REMEMBER ED CURRY!] @ iwethey
PGP key: 1024D/B524687C 2003-08-05
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Post #288,799
7/12/07 4:34:18 PM
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Fortunately..
you speak English. Well.
Can't imagine your not prevailing
(less'n it's a Rove-planted judge. Then you might end up in a place stolen from Cuba, probably for insufficiently pure Farmily Valuez..?)
Still and all - a PITA, of course.
Luck,
I.
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Post #288,805
7/12/07 7:19:26 PM
7/12/07 8:55:53 PM
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Try to relax. You'll win this, obviously. Afterwards...
...try to spare a thought for those of us in Wade's situation, which might be one of a very few even less enviable than yours right now.
I mean, Kssheeh...!, come on -- not even the U.S. "justice" system would go against you on this.
But Justice carries a double-edged sword; not always is the woman a white-as-the-driven-snow damsel in distress, and the man a definitely-blacker-than-night villain; sometimes, it's even pretty close to the other way around(*)... But our Western "justice" systems don't seem to be set up to recognize that fact.
So try not to be a bad winner when eventually, as I'm sure you will, you triumph, is all I'm saying.
(*): Not that I'm necessarily saying that's how it is with Wade... But I'm certainly not saying it necessarily isn't, either.
[link|mailto:MyUserId@MyISP.CountryCode|Christian R. Conrad]
(I live in Finland, and my e-mail in-box is at the Saunalahti company.)
Ah, the Germans: Masters of Convoluted Simplification. — [link|http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/?p=1603|Jehovah]
Edited by CRConrad
July 12, 2007, 07:20:00 PM EDT
Edited by CRConrad
July 12, 2007, 08:55:53 PM EDT
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Post #288,810
7/12/07 8:24:04 PM
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The AU system got overhauled recently.
And by 'recently', I mean in the last two years.
There were two chief changes: the first was that custodial assumptions now begin at 50/50. The old assumption was at least 20 years out of date. The second chief change was change the legal process such that applicants must prove they have tried all the cheaper and faster options for resolving custody before it goes before a judge. Whilst this sounds like the goal was reducing the number of cases that appear before a judge, I'm told by a family law practitioner that the goal was to actually get disputes resolved faster, because going to court is the slowest solution of all.
Wade.
Is it enough to love
Is it enough to breathe
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
| |
Is it enough to die
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be Anything but Ordinary
Please
|
-- "Anything but Ordinary" by Avril Lavigne. | · my ·
· [link|http://staticsan.livejournal.com/|blog] ·
· [link|http://yceran.org/|website] · |
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Post #288,822
7/12/07 8:54:15 PM
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I hope your opinion of me
Is not that of a pure as the driven snow damsel in distress. That is pretty far from the truth.
I'm not concerned about the other women and men out there at the moment. My primary concern is being able to provide for my kids, give them a good life,and do the best I can.
I want to do what is right.
With that said, I am rightly going to have my attorney jump all over his ass.
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Post #288,823
7/12/07 8:58:31 PM
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No, of course it ain't :-) and sure, I know that's what...
...you'll do first.
As I said, *afterwards*.
OK? (Thoughts are cheap. And quick. :-)
[link|mailto:MyUserId@MyISP.CountryCode|Christian R. Conrad]
(I live in Finland, and my e-mail in-box is at the Saunalahti company.)
Ah, the Germans: Masters of Convoluted Simplification. — [link|http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/?p=1603|Jehovah]
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Post #288,826
7/12/07 9:15:52 PM
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Okay.
When this is over, I'll worry about the plight of others as I normally do- but right now, it's all about me, baby.
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Post #288,828
7/12/07 9:53:18 PM
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Doesn't want to pay child support?
*mutter* *grumble*
HOW could someone want to screw over KIDS!
Burn him good!
Imric's Tips for Living
- Paranoia Is a Survival Trait
- Pessimists are never disappointed - but sometimes, if they are very lucky, they can be pleasantly surprised...
- Even though everyone is out to get you, it doesn't matter unless you let them win.
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Nothing is as simple as it seems in the beginning,
As hopeless as it seems in the middle,
Or as finished as it seems in the end.
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Post #289,144
7/16/07 7:37:27 PM
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Well...
I met with the attorney today. I'm a big wad of cash poorer, but I should be able to recoup that and then some when we go to court. It went well. Thanks for all your input. It helped me a lot when I spoke to the attorney.
Huge relief!
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Post #289,149
7/16/07 8:40:46 PM
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What is the term of endearment?
TOLD YA SO! NEENER, NEENER!
There are a *few* times when attorneys are worth 10 times their weight in gold. Other than that, though... I wouldn't waste sewage water giving it to a thirsty one.
--
[link|mailto:greg@gregfolkert.net|greg],
[link|http://www.iwethey.org/ed_curry|REMEMBER ED CURRY!] @ iwethey
PGP key: 1024D/B524687C 2003-08-05
Fingerprint: E1D3 E3D7 5850 957E FED0 2B3A ED66 6971 B524 687C
Alternate Fingerprint: 09F9 1102 9D74 E35B D841 56C5 6356 88C0
Alternate Fingerprint: 455F E104 22CA 29C4 933F 9505 2B79 2AB2
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Post #289,268
7/17/07 4:23:05 PM
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I'm sure I'll hear a few choice words of endearment
When he gets served.
It will get ugly really fast. I am a little worried about seeing him at the hearing. Might have to hire some body guards.
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Post #289,273
7/17/07 4:37:48 PM
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ping me offline if you need to
Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
Any opinions expressed by me are mine alone, posted from my home computer, on my own time as a free american and do not reflect the opinions of any person or company that I have had professional relations with in the past 51 years. meep
reach me at [link|mailto:bill.oxley@cox.net|mailto:bill.oxley@cox.net]
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Post #289,277
7/17/07 5:04:32 PM
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Thanks
You big lug.
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Post #289,279
7/17/07 5:16:04 PM
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Dim bulb
is what he is if he thought you wouldn't respond in kind.
Too much of today's music is fashionable crap dressed as artistry.Adrian Belew
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Post #289,288
7/17/07 5:43:43 PM
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Yep.
Good thing I've chosen wiser the 2nd time around.
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