Top Secrets intercepts by our spies have shown that Al Qaeda has been looking toward Pat Roberson on how to gain WMD.

Quoting one agent, "They're watching him. They've got subscriptions to the 700 Club. They're taking clues on how he operates."

While others have discounted the numerous satellite antennas in the Middle East aimed at 700 Club satellites, one agent reported "Look, they know what we know. Roberson gets results. Look, he prayed for Rehnquist dead and he got it."

Others claim that the difference in faith won't make a difference. One source was quoted as saying "Don't you get it? They're not Christians! God won't listen to them!"

However, others are worried. One unnamed source cites, "We don't know if God will listen to them or not. Hell, to destroy us, they might even switch faiths. Are we going to wait for a Katrina before we take them out?"