Last guy I referred an Insurance salesman to was Ray Carol. His resume:
  • Minor scars from having the landing craft he was driving blown out from under him by Japanese artillery.

  • More minor scars caused by the rifle he grabbed from a dead guy on the beach - it proved defective and exploded. He discarded it for another.

  • Bullet hole in left sholder from trying to lift a case of sake from a Japanese supply depot while the war was still going.

  • Bayonet wound in other sholder from trying to do the same a couple of weeks later.

  • Cut nearly in half by a Jpanese machine gunner. Guts patched up with guinae pig gut (that doesn't show, but that his entire midsection is scar tissue does). His response to questions, "Oh, that, I was shot". Discharged from Navy.

  • Scar up one leg from snaging on sharp sheet metal while taking a flying leap out of the wing of a B52 he was inspecting the fuel tanks of. He thought the plane was exploding but it was just the explosive charges that set off the fire extinguishers - they went off when he wiggled a defective wire. Better to jump now and analyze later.

  • Scar up left temple from a 3" hex nut from a missile silo that blew up killing everyone standing around him.

  • Semicircular scars on his forhead from being hit with a pair of professional bongos by the girlfriend of a musician he was beating up in a barroom brawl.

  • Interesting scar pattern on top of his bald head from being hit over the head with a bottle of champaign at a party. He responded by throwing the guy out through a window. The cop said, "I see it broke because you're not dead".

  • More scars on his head (I had to photograph that injury soon after it happened) from being hit by a stolen truck driven by a guy wanted in 6 states (he was knocked down and one tire hit his head as the guy drove away).

  • More that I've forgotten.
Insurance guy's statement, "Ray Carol will live forever - but I'm not insuring him".