Post #133,039
12/31/03 4:07:31 PM
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I love what I do
I just hate the people I work with because of their behaviors and attitudes. Get me a company with honest, good natured, and kind and gentle people and I'll develop almost anything for them.
"Lady I only speak two languages, English and Bad English!" - Corbin Dallas "The Fifth Element"
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Post #133,047
12/31/03 4:42:02 PM
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Re: I love what I do
In other words, when I find a place where everyone will accept and cowtow to my orientation, I will be so kind as to grace them with my efforts.
No better statement of yours could sum up my appraisal of your narcissism. Flame away!
-drl
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Post #133,049
12/31/03 5:27:23 PM
12/31/03 5:34:01 PM
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Not what I said at all
let me give you an example. At college, people are nicer to me than at the places I used to work at. They accept my weaknesses and are willing to work around them and help me improve to try and get rid of them. They also value my strengths and complement them with their own strengths. I also help them overcome their weaknesses. The sum of the team is greater than the people by themselves. This is in contrast to a workplace full of people who only think of themselves, and sabotage others so they can look better and get a promotion over the others. Want to know what the true difference is? Money, there is no finacial reward for doing good work in college, like there is for work. There is only grades. We work in teams and get graded as a team, so everyone does their best to help each other out so we all can get a better grade. There is also personal papers, quizes, and final exams, so we work alone on that, and work on other things as a team.
It has nothing to do with narcissism, it has everything to do with people accepting me for what and who I am and working with me instead of against me. Win one for the team, for the company, rather that for themselves.
"Lady I only speak two languages, English and Bad English!" - Corbin Dallas "The Fifth Element"
Edited by orion
Dec. 31, 2003, 05:34:01 PM EST
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Post #133,051
12/31/03 6:22:37 PM
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An old lesson
What annoys us most in others is what annoys us most in ourselves.
Do you think that you can walk into a work environment and trust that being pleasant and supportive of others is worthwhile in and of itself? My experience is that if you can manage the trick, people that you would like to work with will tend to notice and react likewise. By contrast if you become competitive with others, any potential support network will melt away before coming into existence.
Cheers,
Ben
"good ideas and bad code build communities, the other three combinations do not"
- [link|http://archives.real-time.com/pipermail/cocoon-devel/2000-October/003023.html|Stefano Mazzocchi]
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Post #133,052
12/31/03 6:41:31 PM
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This is true
in my past workplaces I have trained other programmers, even shared tricks I learned to make programs better. While not all of the other coworkers were competitive, the ones that actually helped me out would eventually end up leaving the firm because of the actions of the competitive ones. Eventually we ended up with a very competitive group of programmers, and management wanted it that way. I can not thrive in such an environment and will get overstressed.
I see competitiveness as being non-productive to the goals and mission statement of the orgnaization. Many followed "The Price" by Machiavelli [link|http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0553212788/103-6513564-3250217?v=glance|http://www.amazon.co...-3250217?v=glance] and followed everything it said to succeed at an organization.
I would rather work in a group who reads "Stewardship" [link|http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1881052869/103-6513564-3250217?v=glance|http://www.amazon.co...-3250217?v=glance] and understand the importance of teams and working with each other instead of against each other. Also emloyees need to be empowered and the wealth needs to be shared.
"Lady I only speak two languages, English and Bad English!" - Corbin Dallas "The Fifth Element"
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Post #133,055
12/31/03 6:50:16 PM
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Hmmm.
in my past workplaces I have trained other programmers Eventually we ended up with a very competitive group of programmers Sorta jumps out at ya, doesn't it. -----------------------------------------
"After months of searching and billions of dollars,
we've finally captured the man who had absolutely nothing to do with 9-11 !"
-Rob Cordry, The Daily Show
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Post #133,060
12/31/03 7:39:38 PM
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Taken out of context
I only trained them on programming skills, not on how to deal with other people. I shared my knowledge of programming, the rest was up to them. Maybe it was my fault that I didn't train them to work as team players?
I did not teach them how to be competitive, I taught them how to work better with the languages involved.
There were programmers that worked with me, I felt I could accomplish anything with them. It was like a team, we integrated our programs to work with each other. We both benefited from each other. Those were the salad days before management encourged others to be competitive and ruined things.
"Lady I only speak two languages, English and Bad English!" - Corbin Dallas "The Fifth Element"
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Post #133,112
1/1/04 4:44:51 AM
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See??? - You___Aren't___Crazy__[.]
- - - merely (and sadly, often lugubriously) disappointed.
Having come from a different milieu, I can say -
I understand that. The trick is to not take the failings of dozens (or even millions) personally. It is your past and current folly: to do exactly that. Ross is correct, even if his style grates on you (since you perceive the New idea as Hostile: and it is! .. but only to your faux-'personality').
Yes, it seems... "reasonable" (that people *ought* to behave in this way) - but only via the silly standards of Right/Wrong you were taught as a child. If you cannot reinvent 'yourself': No One can do this for you, for reasons so basic as to be inexpressible. If you wish sincerely to reach adulthood some day:
Believe NOTHING of what you have been taught! Yes: NOTHING.
It is all.. conventional euphemism (the deeply ingrained habit of the society you find yourself surrounded-by!), a mindset passed on by the fearful ---> so as to create supportive New fearful-ones. "Treating fear" has recently become, even - an entire fre$h Pharm-chem Industry!
(Fact: There_really_is_Nothing_to be_afraid_of.)
Fear itself (except in certain necessarily visceral situations re physical survival == walking along the edge of a cliff, say) is always a symptom of not yet knowing What you are, never mind 'who'. Word, that...
All the rest is fake emotional fear. And the Larger-trick is to finally realize that, *all* emotional-fear is internally imagined, then reinforced by the prevailing bafflegab we call psychology; lately reinforced by a plethora of Designer Drugs, modelled upon the fictional Soma of Brave New World -- and overtly advertised! on that same Tee Vee:
even for those who experience er "shyness at parties", and the like: you can now bugger your 'doctor' to prescribe a brilliant New Drug, to go with your present soup. Just watch your Tee Vee Ads: you will see. Don't believe anything someone just "says"! (including me)
ie
Yes, you are quite Correct: a culture which emphasized cooperation would *indeed be* a vastly more mature one than the present callow, juvenile one we both sort-of inhabit. I confirm your observation FWIW (not much) - you have to discriminate All By Yourself. And that is something you have, thus far - little experience in relying upon - the trusting of your own perceptions.
Maturity will arrive: when you see the same contradictions, wish it were 'different' {sigh} -- yet also see "the world" as: working Exactly as "a world of duality In All Things": Would/Should DOES 'Work' !!
It could not be any different than the Way It Is. <<<
No. Don't reply: not until you have tried-out ditching much of the habit-baggage you carry with you in all situations (and actually Like..) and - have something New to say.
As in: later.
And if none of this makes the slightest sense to you - leave it for what you call the unconscious to either sort out, or dismiss. That's something I can't 'do' for you (either). If there's a third option, it is: never mind.
Luck.
PS - don't even think about 'links'
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