A guy I work with is a Perl/Oracle/PL-SQL
programmer who is quite capable of playing
DBA. The "real" dba asks him for advice.
And then he asks me.

And he is a MAJOR francophile.

He visits Paris for at least 2 weeks
a year, has weekly French lessons, has
a French word of the day calendar, and
is waiting for his inlaws to kick so he
can inherit a bunch of money and move to
Paris.

I sent him your post.