My English mate told me that my wife and I surprised my English mate's sister (she's a year or two younger than I and lives in Woodcote) when we visited with our attitudes, familiarity with some less well known Brits (particularly comedians - said she when he told her we were going to the Omni in Reading to see Jimmy Carr, "THEY know our Jimmy Carr?"), demeanor, etc. He said he told her, "These are not typical Americans."

If that is true, and I suspect it may be, then another atypical feature I possess is an inability to understand the use of that word in the American sense. I suspect that your reaction, Peter, to hearing that word is not at all dissimilar from mine. When I've used it, it has always been in one of the contexts you describe.

My English mate and I watch football on week-ends at our local and he and I have both used it whilst watching matches (typically directed at one another). About six months before the trip he told me almost daily, "Now when we go to Stamford Bridge, you cannot swear at all and you cannot say, 'cunt' about anything. They'll remove us from the stadium." So, in the opening minutes of the match the ball moved to the far end and everyone stood up. The ball went out for a corner and everyone sat back down (there's signs all over warning you could be asked to leave for "Persistent Standing"). But a group of very large guys remained standing, blocking our view. A small man in the seat below mine waited a moment or two then bellowed out, "Sit down y' cunts!" and they sheepishly sank to their seats. I immediately grinned and looked at my English mate (who had his face in his hands) and said, "I am among my people."

I don't think I can ever forgive my late parents for stupidly forcing me to be born in the wrong country and worse, never moving to correct the situation.