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New unreasonable deadline
A quarter of a century ago I was given an unreasonable deadline, advanced by a week: the finished product had to be ready by close of business on Friday. I arrived at FCT&D at six o'clock Thursday morning and worked through COB the following day, just short of thirty-six hours. At that point I'd been on the payroll for fourteen years, and my provisional "art director" gig was nearing the expiry of its notional charter (it was of course renewed and eventually formalized), so there was a certain incentive. Also, I was not yet thirty-nine.

This afternoon I was handed a spreadsheet* with a couple of hundred names and brief narratives, and told to turn these into handsome "certificates of recognition" (sorry about the Christmas bonus, munchkins, but look of these handsome certificates laser-printed on faux-parchment!), and to have these ready by the end of the week. Nahguhhap'n. I don't do day-and-a-half shifts anymore. It is well that the middle manager to whom I now report is afraid of me (I keep her off balance by alternately playing the irascible codger and the frail, slightly senescent cardiac case). They're going to miss my services when I'm gone—there are things I do that no one else in the organization has a clue about—but I'm doing my best to ease the transition for them, so that the sense of loss will be to an extent ameliorated by one of relief.

cordially,

*Is there a way to import an Excel document into InDesign, mailmerge style? Possibly. If so, I suspect it involves scripting, and I'm not prepared to undertake this. And I grow tired of being handed the equivalents of scrawls on a cocktail napkin as the point of departure for my work.
New make the pretty certs with suitable blanks and hand it back with the spreadsheet
with instructions that all she has to do is fill in the blanks. As an art director you do not have any experience in data entry. Alternatively a quick trip to a Kinko's may be faster with less heartburn.
always look out for number one and don't step in number two
New Eh, just do it in Word
Life's too short.
New Which is what *they* will do
Not me.

cordially,
New Double-printed?
Do the blank certificates in InDesign, then use Word to do the mail-merge. Print enough certificates and them run them through the printer twice. :-P

I'm sure you've thought of that...

Wade.
New Re: Double-printed?
I suggested that. They seem to think that Word can merge into a fieldless PDF. I'm skeptical. No doubt they'll fill me in on the details of their failure next week.

cordially,
New Nuh uh
Running paper through a laser printer twice is a no-no.

The fusing process dries out the paper and means the rollers can't grip it as effectively, and Mr Jam comes to town.
New Really?
Huh. Never heard that one before.

Wonder how that affects double-sided printers.

Wade.
New Was told that by the engineer who services our copy-press printers
Great big things they are, quite unlike a desktop printer.

They also have one-pass duplex.

YMMV, I guess.
New AFAIK, all the consumer/SOHO laser printers are dual-pass.
We've got a couple of Lexmark lasers at home (MS315 and CS410) which default to double-side printing (via putting the paper through twice). They work fine.

I've got an old huge Lexmark T522 in my office that has a bad problem with jambs when the humidity is low (just about any time from October - March). It doesn't do duplex...

Maybe they have better rubber on the rollers now, or something.

As you say, YMMV. :-)

Cheers,
Scott.
New Fair enough.
YMMV indeed. :-)

Personally, I've not seen or used single-pass duplex printers. (Even the largest floor-standing devices I've ever seen duplex in two passes.) But I live and learn.

Wade.
New That's part of the deterrent, no?
New InDesign has a Data Merge feature
I've never used said feature, but the top Google results include words like "issues", "errors", "problem", and "madness".
New ICLRPD
I've never used said feature, but the top Google results include words like "issues", "errors", "problem", and "madness".
--

Drew
New +5, Hilarious.
New Oddly enough, you get the same results when searching for 'Hastur' and 'PC LOAD LETTER'...
Regards,
-scott
Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson.
Expand Edited by malraux Dec. 17, 2016, 04:11:27 PM EST
New "And now you see that Evil will always win, because Good is stupid."
--

Drew
New "I think that might be an LRPDism candidate... "
Regards,
-scott
Welcome to Rivendell, Mr. Anderson.
     unreasonable deadline - (rcareaga) - (18)
         make the pretty certs with suitable blanks and hand it back with the spreadsheet - (boxley)
         Eh, just do it in Word - (pwhysall) - (10)
             Which is what *they* will do - (rcareaga) - (9)
                 Double-printed? - (static) - (8)
                     Re: Double-printed? - (rcareaga) - (1)
                         Been there, done that - (crazy)
                     Nuh uh - (pwhysall) - (5)
                         Really? - (static) - (3)
                             Was told that by the engineer who services our copy-press printers - (pwhysall) - (2)
                                 AFAIK, all the consumer/SOHO laser printers are dual-pass. - (Another Scott)
                                 Fair enough. - (static)
                         That's part of the deterrent, no? -NT - (scoenye)
         InDesign has a Data Merge feature - (altmann) - (5)
             ICLRPD - (drook) - (4)
                 +5, Hilarious. -NT - (static)
                 Oddly enough, you get the same results when searching for 'Hastur' and 'PC LOAD LETTER'... -NT - (malraux) - (2)
                     "And now you see that Evil will always win, because Good is stupid." -NT - (drook) - (1)
                         "I think that might be an LRPDism candidate... " -NT - (malraux)

Seriously, for someone who shows some signs of intelligence, the consistency with which you misunderstand anything inconvenient to you is quite amazing.
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