The exit interview (a week before the exit)

Post #268,484 by broomberg 9/23/06 7:02:30 PM Reply	The exit interview (a week before the exit) Yesterday. Scheduled for 30 minutes. Lasted 70. The HR person who gave it to me was the HR person who "greeted" me into the company. We have a lot of history together. Most ... hmmm ... amusing. At least for me. Only us. Standard questions. Of course, each had a lot of followup discussion. Why are you leaving? It is time. What your title appropriate for what you did? Not at all. Did you feel you were adequately compensated? I was well compensated as compared to my "peers", undercompensated as compared to the value I brought to the company. Did you get adequate direction and and training? Hehehe. I was self directing and self taught. I designed the systems that were being put in place before I started the job. What did you like? Early runup - insanely busy and productive. Customers loved us and we made a mint. What did you dislike? Dino timeframe - death spiral - pre corporate buyout. How was the communication? To me? I had back-channels - I knew everything. To anyone else? Terrible. We had lots of wandering discussions about the years. Since the head of HR hated my brother, we had lots of stories of watching each side of the battles, with the different viewpoints. Was good. Then she brought out the document. Sign here. Huh? The document was me acknowledging that I had already signed other documents and had certain responsibilities even when I was no longer employed. Me: Huh? Why would I need to sign a document that said I signed a document. Read closer. Wait a minute! I never agreed that I would not solicit other employees. Power grab! Not happening - no I will not sign it. Her: Oh - I must have given you the wrong one. Typity typity Print! Her: Here you go, please sign. Me: Huh? There is more in this other paragragh concerning solicitation. I mean, after all, how would you feel if I called you up and offered you a job! Her: Hmm - let me read the original doc you signed. Hmmm. Nope - nothing in there - let me get rid of that. Typity typity Print! Me: More read... hmmm - what does zealous mean and why would I zealously defend the company's interest? Her: yadda yadda yadda. Me: Hmm - Seems OK. She pushes the pen at me. Me: I mean it is OK for my step-mother to review - you know, the lawyer. Her: Oh - OK - well, I'm on vacation next week. Please slip it under my door on Monday. Me: But it says I've given back my computer, phone, and everything else. That would not be true then. Her: I trust you. Me: Nope - can't give it to you until after then, not that I'm saying I WILL. Her: OK! Just put it under my door after you give your stuff back. Me: But I can't, I'll have given my badge back in the other building and I might not be able to get back into this one. Her: OKOKOK!!! Just give it to the receptionist. Me: ok. So then I realized there is absolutely NO reason for me to sign this. None! They are not given me anything, there is no severence, nothing. I'm not signing squat!
Post #268,489 by boxley 9/23/06 7:23:38 PM Reply	what are they gonna do fire you? efm Any opinions expressed by me are mine alone, posted from my home computer, on my own time as a free american and do not reflect the opinions of any person or company that I have had professional relations with in the past 50 years. meep
Post #268,512 by Ashton 9/24/06 2:50:50 AM Reply	Know what this skit evoked? (No.. no, of course not - it's all.. well, it's - -) It's an Allegory! Lampoon of the exit-strategy from Iraq - performed by the same boy scouts as spawned the entrance-strategy. He who is One-Down ... 'bargaining' As. If. {Rough Draft} Scenario [Some Rep for the US] meets [finally ...] with a Rep of each of the (so-far identified) factions and opens with ~~ US Rep: Look, you-all want US outta here; know what? - so do we. Will you just promise next, to play nice and get together and make a government and stuff - if we go away? Insurgents 1 through n: Why should I/we want to do that? You never asked for permission to trash the place - And we kinda Like the fact you're finally getting asses whupped ... and - - US Rep: {sigh} Ok, O.K. Already - look, let's modify this voluntary agreement we know you're anxious to sign, a little bit: play nice for say, 60 days. Wouldn't it be worth that to get US outta here? ... [please; pretty Please?] Insurgent #42: We want damages - have your people call my people. And.. we want Mr. Bring-It-On to put on that flying suit, personally deliver the gold on that fancy aircraft carrier (it'll be too heavy to send in by air, anyway.) Well, something like that. Always appreciate hearing your charming vignettes from the Suited jungle. So many of them seem to be just slightly removed from the Aeneid, only.. the One-Down characters imagine that their position is tenable. And special. Jeez, with your book and Box's on NYT Best Seller list -- IWE could pay dividends! and we could design the logo for the Company Jet, talkin like Pirates. (Screw Larry Ellison's King-size bed on that boring 747 ego-duel thing with [Some Other Rich Guy.] -- I've got a design involving piranhas, aerogel and Jello\ufffd.) The Internet is wonderful, but it is a two-edged sword. Years ago, I pointed out that it used to be that every village had its idiot, but all he could do was sit in the village square and mutter to himself. With the Internet, all the village idiots now can converse, compare notes and build on each other's mutterings, making them ... global village idiots. --Ask the Pilot 6-2-06
Post #268,554 by imqwerky 9/24/06 9:23:26 PM Reply	ICLRPD I've got a design involving piranhas, aerogel and Jello\ufffd Smile, Amy [link\|http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?Amy%20Rathman\|Pics of the Family]

Welcome to IWETHEY!