Finally, I hired a guy named J.C., who is a Microsoft Certified Technician. He was in my office for the better part of two days, most of it on the phone with Technical Support. It was fascinating for me, a layperson, to hear the technical terminology that J.C. used to get the information he needed: ``DO NOT PUT ME ON HOLD, DO YOU HEAR ME? DO NOT PUT ME ON HO... HELLO? HELLO?? YOU (very nontechnical term)!''