unless another window of GAIM is already on top.

Lately, they managed to screw up window flashing as well - it does not stop until you send a message or minimize/restore.

I realize it may be GTK problems, but my life is no easier.

Lately some work has been done on it, the 0.78 is better than before, but not quite there yet.

On Linux, I never had anyproblems with it. Works perfectly all the time.